Poignant Days

Sleeping at 2 in the morning with tonnes of stuffs in mind can be pretty disturbing, tormenting and annoying at the same time. Have you ever tried waking up every subsequent hour when you are lazing around in your dreamland? And the same thing always appears in your head throughout the sleeping hours? How about when you can actually feel that you are 70% awake all the time when you are trying pretty hard to take a nice, comfortable nap?

This process goes on and on.

Happy days are over.

Life's a roller coaster.

Melancholic Smile

It always happens...

Words never go through my big head before coming out of my mouth...
And this has been my weakness for a long long time...
Well, I tried very hard but seems like it ain't working..
Hope things go the way I want it to be and maybe I should stop counting chickens before the eggs hatch!

On another irrelevant note..
I must say that I'm impressed with this drawing done entirely using the programme "Paint" =]

Both of the cow pictures above look pretty much the same!
And it was drawn by Sabrina =p
Mooooo!!

Vacuum cleaner
Or washing machine?

Thnks Fr Th Mmry

It was a really great day I had around 3 weeks ago.
Thanks everyone for the surprise. Appreciate it lots =]

WHY SO SERIOUS?? LET'S PUT A SMILE ON THAT FACE! Thanks for everything guys =]

Life's not a Bed of Roses

"Life's not a bed of roses" - quote Jun Hsien -

Jun Hsien has been using this phrase to me for numerous times whenever we meet each other. What's the purpose of him telling me that? I have not the slightest idea. Still, he has succeeded in instilling this phrase into my big head. Bravo Mr. Lee =]

One thing for sure, life's definitely not a bed of roses. One has to go through all the ups and downs in life to reach their destination/target. Living in great luxury all the time is also equivalent to living a monotonous life.

I choose to lead a life full of challenges, but sometimes the problems I face are no ordinary ones faced by most of the people. Let's start off with arguments. I don't care much about minor arguments for I have been facing it for the past few years, in other words, I'm getting neutral towards it. But when it comes to major ones, I'm left with no choice and to play my part in solving it accordingly.

I'm always the one to be blamed for no particular reasons. I get scolded or blamed very often yet I prefer to remain quiet. Until one day, when I can feel that the 'patience meter' in me is over its limit, I will try to fight for my own rights, but always to no avail.

This reminds me of a conversation I had with a friend of mine a few days/weeks ago. She didn't believe I am living in sorrow. But now, I guess I can convince you in believing what I said the other day was true. =]

Come to think of it, I am pretty sure what I'm doing now is worth the effort. I, too, believe I can capture it with all my heart and soul. Till then.

v(^^)v

*Do not disturb, I'm trying to get some sleep here!*

*You wake me up! Now get ready to face the consequences!*

*Now try my signature "Bunny Kick"!*

*At long last, I can sleep with peace v(^^)v *

Was browsing through my pictures when I suddenly came across these photos =]
His name is Bamboo Christiano Alurjaja.
Bamboo because we weren't sure which gender he was when he was still small and tiny.
Christiano because of..... ( I don't remember )
Alurjaja because we were inspired by that ugly leech-like monster's name in Star Wars. ( I think )

A very great friend he was... He never failed to put a smile on everyone's face when things had gone out of place..
I'm starting to miss him... LOL
Seems like more and more people are leaving this place =[

Guilty

As expected, a lot has changed since the day my grandpa left this beautiful world.
The joyous, happiness atmosphere can no longer be felt by me when they came to visit us.
Everyone seemed to be forcing themselves to put a happy smile on their face to change the mood of another person.
One of the obvious changes I could notice a few days back was everyone lost weight.
What can I do to change this situation?

A Man of His Words

A step into the Coronary Care Unit sent shivers down my spine. A few more steps into the room, patients can be seen lying in their respective beds, without spirit and energy. So weak, even reaching for an object a few centimeters away seems impossible for them.

Standing beside his bed, water started to fill in my eyes, for my heart was aching, aching so badly as if thousands of needles were poking it but weren't allowed to express how painful it was. But still, tears did not flow down for a smile could give him the courage to combat the current situation and the will to live on.

Dialysis tube were inserted into his neck, a tube was inserted into his nose to the stomach to remove dirty blood from his stomach, and a few more tubes which I was uncertain what their functions were. Blood had to be taken from time to time to make sure everything went well, and this means needles were poked into his flesh for uncountable times.

It was a heart aching scene. His hands were ice cold and so were his legs. I held his hands, and he held mine as tight as possible. At some time, he would squeeze my hand for a while, as if he were telling me he was very excited, glad and joyful to see me standing beside him, comforting him and giving him support. He didn't have the energy to speak, thus he could only nod his head and hold on tightly to my hand.

It was time to leave, yet he wouldn't want to let go off my hand. Once I released my hands, his limbs were trembling and shaking. All these are still so fresh in my head, and it will be in my head for the rest of my life. Thinking of it causes me to tear, I can feel how much he loves me, and I too, will love him for the rest of my life.

4am in the morning, we received a call. We were told that he was getting weaker. Heartbeat lowered from 70 to 30 beats. We got out off our bed and rushed our way to the hospital. Barely quarter of the distance there, the phone rang, and he left.

It was a good thing he left, for he does not need to suffer anymore longer.
It was also a bad thing he left, for everything we do now will not be the same already, and one person missing in this family makes a huge difference to everyone.

You will always and forever be in my heart.
I love u, Grampa.

He smiled...
When he heard that I was on my way back to visit him...
Although I didn't get the chance to see that final smile on his face...
But that smile, that particular smile, meant a lot to me...